The Places You Won’t Go

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Quality of life is a huge issue when you’re obese. Well, it’s an issue outside of that, but obesity is where your quality of life goes to retire and die.

One of the biggest problems with obesity is not moving. It doesn’t mean you can’t move (most obese people are mobile), it means you don’t want to. It means you simply would rather watch TV, play video games, or stare at a computer or your phone. This is not uncommon; in fact, according to the US Dept of Health and Human Services, less than 5% adults in the US do 30 minutes of physical activity each day.

You’re likely sitting down reading this.

People in general view the obese as lazy and gluttonous. I don’t, but I do know that “lazy” becomes the default the larger you get. You simply don’t have the ability to do much or move around much without getting tired. You can’t move like people smaller than you, and it feels Sisyphean to try.

This is a problem, because that laziness is an investment in yourself the same way effort is; the more you invest in laziness as a lifestyle, the lazier you become. It’s an investment nobody can afford, so let’s change that around.

I need you to agree on one thing for me: “I need to stop investing in laziness and move more.”

If you don’t agree to the above, or think it doesn’t apply to you, that’s fine. We all grade our own papers when it comes to where we feel we are at in life. If you feel you’re passing, you may be one of the ones who does get up and move around a lot. If so, awesome! If not, the following advice won’t really work for you, because you have to acknowledge your laziness.

Quick note: I do not judge those who are lazy as long as they are willing to change it. I was paying people to clean my house at my max weight because I’d convinced myself that I shouldn’t have to clean the house when I was the breadwinner; the reality is that I was justifying my laziness because effort was painful and tiring. I understand the motivation to do nothing, but that motivation needs to change.

How You Become Lazy

You let the dishes linger. You let the house get a little dirty. “I’ll pick up the house later,” you tell yourself, fully intending to do it but also knowing you won’t follow through until you absolutely have to.

What is laziness? It’s a habit, like many other things. Did you wake up one day and say “well, I’m just gonna let the dishes go an extra day today?” No, you didn’t, because that would be obvious. Instead, it was “oh, I have other things to do, I’ll do them later”, then “oh, I’m too tired from other stuff, I’ll do them tomorrow”, and repeat with some mix of the above.

You habitually put off tasks that you know will cause you pain and fatigue, because both of those things suck. Obesity, at its core, involves a race to the bottom of physical health, because it requires you do less and less the more you gain, until you’re bedridden.

But like every other habit, this one is fixable!

How You Stop Being Lazy

If you’re lazy, you’re gonna hate this section, because you’ll know what to do, so you don’t have excuses anymore. 🤷‍♂️

As I alluded to earlier, getting lazy starts with letting the basics slide. You’ve made a habit of it, and now you have to break it. We’ve also touched on how much harder things are to do when you’re obese.

You have to tackle this in a couple of different ways, because you have two different behaviors fueling this:

  1. Instinctive avoidance of physical effort
  2. Reduction in personal living standards

For point 1, you have to get up and clean/do chores/go for a walk. You don’t have to do these all at once, nor should you. If you currently don’t move much, overdoing it will set you back.

What you need to do, is catch yourself putting it off. “Oh, I’ll do the dishes later”…why? Why do you actually need to wait to do them? There is an overwhelming chance you don’t need to wait. You likely aren’t doing anything so important that you can’t spend 20 minutes doing the dishes.

If doing 20 minutes of dishes hurts, do two sets of 10 minutes of dishes. If mopping hurts your back and feet, do half of a room, sit down for 5 minutes, do the other half.

If you can’t walk for very long, figure out a distance you’re comfortable with, and start going on walks. Can you walk for 10-15 minutes at a time? It’s likely that you can. If you can do more than that without overdoing yourself, more power to you.

When you tell yourself that you’ll go for a walk later, you know you’re full of shit now. Just go do it and get it over with. Eventually it will be easy. I was walking around Las Vegas at over 400 lbs and was almost used to it after a week of walking constantly. It sucked, but I survived. You will too, and with less effort.

For point 2, this is the natural consequence of laziness. The lazier you are, the more OK with clutter/rot/whatever being in your house. Since you’ve conditioned yourself to not do things because they hurt/are tiring, you’ve accepted that part of this condition involves learning to be OK with more filth.

Point 2 is the real reason that point 1 is a problem; putting off cleaning and moving only happens because you’ve become OK with the filth in your house and the fat on your body. You’ve accepted this as a reality because your standards reflect in your behaviors. Changing your behaviors changes your standards.

You need to set appropriate standards for yourself and your house. Are you OK with leaving the dinner dishes until morning? Fine, but you have to do them the next morning. Are you OK with not walking after work? Fine, but you have to walk after lunch, or at some point before work. The more you act, the better standards you set for yourself that you will now live up to, because you’ll be breaking the bad habits of laziness and building the habits of better living.

Once you’ve set your standards, you will be frustrated when they aren’t met; this will spur you into action to get yourself and your home back up to your standards.

The more you live up to your standards, you’ll discover that you start habitually doing things you didn’t realize you could get yourself to do on a regular basis.


Laziness isn’t a life sentence. Poor standards are not a life sentence. What you do in your life determines what kind of standards you want to live up to. Nobody in the world can fix your standards and effort except for you.

You have the ability to fix these things; you can get to a point where you feel great about your house and how much you do and move around, but you have to start ASAP.

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